Unconditional Respect: I believe very sincerely that this is the heart of true submission. It takes little to no effort to behave respectfully to Bruce when I am feeling appreciated, heard, honored, or loved; the challenge is to show respect when I am feeling under-appreciated, neglected, mistreated, etc. But doing so in these times shows my commitment to him and to this dynamic more than anything else ever could. It is in these times where we BOTH end up deepening our commitment to the each other and to this dynamic we're involved in.
This week our little family was confronted with an upsetting situation that has pushed Bruce and I even more than we are already currently being pushed. I'd prefer to avoid specifics, but we've been upset, overwhelmed, and exhausted for the past few days, and this next week will be even worse .So since it will be almost impossible not to feel under-appreciated, neglected, etc. in such extreme circumstances, this is a great week to focus on unconditional respect! The challenge I propose to myself (and anyone who wants to join me!) this week is to show unconditional respect in the following specific ways:
Mon - Thank him for a specific sacrifice he makes or has recently made for the family
Tues - Ask him in the evening what I can do to ease the stress of his day
Wed - Serve him in an unsolicited way (back rub, packing his lunch, etc.)
Thur - Tell him about a specific quality or trait that I find sexually attractive
Beautiful things always seem to happen when we shift our focus away from ourselves, so here goes. I realize it won't make things any simpler or easier, but at the very least it will prevent me from doing some unproductive and potentially destructive self pitying. Wish me luck!